... gives you “More Half-Dead Sea Creatures on a Ship.”
Yup. I saw it this weekend. Ask H’n’B: I LOVE Curse of the Black Pearl. It’s good on so many levels: excellent plot; complicated at times, but accessible; swashbuckling, a fine balance of comedy, action, drama, etc. All in all, a very smart movie. It’s just well rounded and brilliantly done, which is why SO many people are looking SO forward to seeing the sequel: Dead Man’s Chest. (By the way, there’s no Plot Spoiler here. If you want that, ask me.)
The Good: Cap’n Jack Sparrow, Elizabeth Swann, Will Turner, “Bootstrap” Bill Turner (father of said Will), and many more of the characters from the first make their appearances, so there’s a great amount of continuity. Some of them are also rather surprising in their new roles. We also get some new scenery (but this appears in the “bad,” section as well). The score for the movie isn’t so heavily themed on swashbuckling, and there are a number of different styles worked in by Mr. Zimmer, and one in particular MAKES the scene. You’ll know which one it is. Bill Nighy (super cool actor, not to be confused with Bill Nye [the science guy][both last names pronounced the same]) plays Davy Jones himself, and is a rather cool villain. Also worthy to mention that his “beard,” or whatever is entirely computer generated. This is cool because it actually retains (believe it or not) Mr. Nighy’s facial features in among all that ~googly~. There’s a lot of action and you get some backstory as well. There are times when the movie progresses extremely well, and you feel that quite a lot is being accomplished. It’s nice. Visually stunning in more ways than one. Oh, also, more Jack Sparrow-ish over-complication of explaining very simple things. Quite humorous.
The Bad: It’s incredibly dark; NO, not nighttime dark (well, yes, at times), but very ominous and almost morbid. CBP (Curse of the Black Pearl, unlike a Cambodian Cong) was unique (I think) in that the colors and cinematography were all very rich, and not very bright. This one is just very very dark. There are times when we move onto land and enjoy a brighter scape, but it’s pretty well-roundedly a dark film. Quite slow at times, and some parts are quite unnecessary. Some of these scenes are things you’d think you would see on the “deleted scenes” DVD, but apparently they decided not to, and most of them seem to be directed toward a younger audience. They’re playful and goofy, and more Disney-ish, but not without a happy helping of pirateness to make you feel not so stupid for watching it. The plot (and I’ve heard some say “what plot?”) becomes redundant at times. The dialogue begins to falter at some points, but it’s not terrible. You got the general idea that the story (i.e. the information and characters and any progression of plot) were necessary for the third movie, but did not sustain themselves quite as well as a movie unto itself.
The Ugly: First, the literal: some of the characters were quite grotesque, and it was a step up from the undead pirates in the first one. I grew to love them, but these are beastly and quite disgusting. Takes some getting used to. There are some mystical overtones (or undertones, whichever is more subtle), but no more than in the first film. My biggest complaint with the movie is the ending. Again, I say nothing to spoil, but anyone that went to see this film knew BEFORE WALKING INTO THE THEATRE that the third film was already in production. By saying that I mean to argue that it is unnecessary to set the third movie up by means of the second. That’s shameless plugging of a film. Therefore, my complaint is that they divided DMC and what is currently called “At World’s End,” (or some variation thereof) in one of the worst possible places. I’m still getting over the shock and disappointment, and they DO let you know that IT will be fixed, repaired, and all brought back to normal (hopefully), but the feeling you get when leaving the movie is not one of accomplishment, resolve, or completion. It’s of a horrible lack of closure; now, I’m no Dr. Phil patient, but CBP finished with some resolve. You left satisfied and content. I would have left DMC both satisfied and content if I had been assured to see the follow-up as soon as I got home, but I am reminded that it was three years since the first one came out, and to wait until 2009 to see how (holds hand over mouth) ____ gets rescued by the ______ from the ______ in the ______ is just far too long to wait in my opinion. I should have just waited another three years and seen them both together. I don’t need to carry around all that baggage.
All that having been said, I REALLY wanted to like the movie, and if I saw it again, I probably would. It’s more of an acquired taste.