Don't bother reading unless you're looking for updates on a childish TV show

I’m watching France and Portugal right now, and was rooting for one team, then decided I would pull for whoever scored first. After the first half, I decided that I was going to do the opposite.

I have committed to Affie to do something. I mentioned to her that I Dunno and I have started watching this particular show, and I watched the series premiere last Monday. The second episode came on this past Monday, and I convinced my bro to watch it with me. Afterward he committed to “definitely” watching the series with me. I’m not shy about what I watch on television, and am even proud of watching things such as Parental Control despite its absolute lack of (any kind of) value. Everyone needs some trash television (not of content, but intellectual or material worth) to sit in front of on occasion. HOWEVER, I’m a little disappointed to say that I have begun to enjoy a television show that comes on, not MTV, not Animal Planet, not VH1, and not even Lifetime, but ABC Family.

The show , like I said, started last Monday. The thing I told Affie I would do is to fill her in so she’s up on the show and can watch it next Monday. So here’s what happened. I missed the first few minutes of it, but was readily apparent that:

This kid is about 16 years old and fell from the sky, like, literally. He found himself all slimy (and naked) in the woods, but keep in mind he doesn’t know what slimy, naked, or the woods are. Long story short is he was confronted by a snake that hissed at him, found himself still all naked and slimy, but in the city, and was promptly arrested and sent to juvie.

He is now in the slammer. He cannot speak, has no name (but now has clothes), and doesn’t know how to do anything. Oh, he also has no belly button. So in his attempt to understand life, he stares at others to do what they do. He understands no speech, but learns by imitation. In one scene, this cocky ringleader type kid is the object of his attention because they’re at lunch and he’s never actually paid attention to anyone eating before, and this kid is eating a muffin. He imitates what the kid is doing and realizes that this soothes the pain in his stomach. He learns “eating.” While learning, the kid becomes aware that he’s getting stared at and is offended (naturally). Everyone else seems okay with the new kid except for Mr. Head Honcho. He confronts the new kid, and is promptly reprimanded by one of the guards. Later, however, he takes his chance to teach a lesson to the kid who cannot understand or speak. When this happens, the new kid gets scared. He is punched in the face, falls to the ground and urinates on himself out of fear. The comment is made by the narrator, the boy himself, that that function makes him feel better also. Two things learned: eating, and relieving. Verdict: both good.

Long story short (whatever!) the doctor at the facility takes a look at him and realizes he’s strange: calls his friend, a psychologist, to come take a look. The psychologist is a happy wife and mother of two. She comes to investigate, gives him a name (Kyle), and she decides (with hubby’s consent) to let him live with the family for a few days, until the missing persons report reveals who he is.

A few things when he gets home. He learns how to play a kindergartener’s game on the computer, wanders off to watch the neighbor’s girl play the piano, startles her, and is later accused of breaking in to “attack” her. The girl takes a liking to him, though.

Geez, it’s a big deal summarizing TWO episodes of a child’s drama series.

(The world cup finals are officially over and I know who won).

Episode one also includes the young child being caught with a nudy magazine, and Kyle finds it for him after his mother hides it. Kyle also follows the psychiatrist’s daughter when she sneaks out to a party and he gets stone drunk. He fights off a policeman that crashes the party, rescues the girl and carries her home. He performs some amazing programming/reading really fast scrolling text thing and fixes a computer that the husband is trying to fix. The family decide he can stay. So boring for those of you that don’t care.

Ya know what? Forget it. Check out the page above and browse around. It's better anyway. Because people pay them to write that stuff...


Affable Olive said...

Parental Control isn't as good as MADE, but better than Next. Actually, your episode summaries are better than the ones there. They are like one sentence and tell me nothing about the show. As part of the deal, I'll watch next Monday...and then resume making fun of you for watching it.

Horse N. Buggy said...

Dude, not even I am going to watch that!

Affable Olive said...

It was part of the deal H'n'B since I want to continue to make fun of him.

Affable Olive said...

OK, I now know one thing I will not be doing on Monday nights at 8 PM.

What's my name again??? said...

Hey Poly this is my first post!!!!WOOT WOOT!!! I just wanted to post to tell you that in my Russian Dictionary there are such words as Beckam,Blogger,and Bluetooth and as you can tell I have only looked at the B's I will do the A's tonight...Thank you for telling me the Dictionary to get i'm very happy!! And I know what i'll be doing at 8pm on Monday nights!!

Affable Olive said...

*cough* UPDATE! *cough*